11 November, 2003 4:59 PM
Most of these strangers only let me glimpse a small part of their life. For some they share their political views, others talk about work, faith, relationships, culture or technology.
Others on the other hand bare all! Its like they are doing a nudie run from the shower to the bedroom as I peep through their window.
Just this morning in the time it took to drink a coffee I read one person tell of the heart break of their marriage breaking down, another shared the more intimate details of last nights date a third shared of a faith crisis and another posted a digital photo of a rash that had been bothering them in hope of an online diagnosis.
Sometimes I wonder what makes people share such intimate details about their lives - I worry about the impact it might have to share such personal details in such a public way.
Then other times, like this morning, I wonder what makes people (me to be more specific) want to read about the marital problems, sex lives, questioning faith and rashes of complete strangers? What does that say about my own sanity? Why do I do it? What impact might it have upon me?
Perhaps the thing that worries me most is that I'm becoming numb to it all. Despite the nature of what I read this morning I barely raised an eyebrow.
Every day we're bombarded by people baring their all. Blogging is just part of the mix of reality TV, celebrity exposés and live news being beamed into our living-rooms round the clock. We have become a voyeuristic society - we clamor for the inside word, to see the real lives of others, yet at the same time are becoming more and more numb to it all.
In our obsession to see into the lives of others do we somehow run the risk of disengaging from our own? Share your thoughts in comments.
Comments
Page:
I've often wondered if the blogging phenomenon is due to the desire to feel famous or at least to be recognized by the public. Sort of like the "reality TV" trend where anyone can have their 15 minutes of fame no matter who they are and what they do. And of course, anyone can set up a blog and have their writing read by whoever on earth. Although, I do have to say that blogs give the author more control than on television. Perhaps this goes back to the need of feeling validated by others? I wouldn't be surprised if blogs became increasingly popular everyday, with more people taking up a bit of the web space for themselves.
Neely » 11 November, 2003 6:46 PM
Really good question(s).
People (us) are no different than ever before. The technology just introduces new opportunities (good and bad).
There have got to be as many reasons for doing this as there are people but here some specifc ones I can think of:
voyeurism (as previously stated)
narcissism (sp ?)
desire to be known (in the most legitimate sense)
therapy
information exchange (leading to relationship?)
calling
news
etc...
bill » 11 November, 2003 11:30 PM
I think blogging helps us "cut to the chase". If you were to meet someone in person, you'd be doing all the getting-to-know-you stuff and you may never get any further than that. But when we "meet" people online through the blog, we cut through all that surface stuff and get to the meat of what's really going on in each other's lives, what we're thinking about and how we're feeling. I love blogs for that reason -- they help me to connect with people at a very real level.
I'm actually careful about what I reveal on the blog (although it doesn't always look like it). But I want to also talk about the things that matter. And struggles with faith, rocky relationships, etc are all part of that.
At the same time, seeing into the lives of others helps me to remember I'm not alone in some of the things I face (again, connecting is a factor) and I learn from other people's experiences & words.
irene » 11 November, 2003 11:54 PM
I think all those are very good reasons as to why a person would read and/or have a blog. I'd say that for anyone who has one, it is most likely because they simply want their thoughts and feelings to be heard and responded to. I'd say that is a normal human characteristic we all have. Blogging makes this simple and fun.
As for the question: In our obsession to see into the lives of others do we somehow run the risk of disengaging from our own? I'd say that if anything it would be the exact opposite. Reading about other peoples’ lives and experiences adds on to yours, and broadens your every day thoughts. This is especially so if you're one to comment on what people have to say often. It gets you thinking about your own life or maybe what you do or have done in the subject situation.
Jessica » 11 November, 2003 11:59 PM
For me, it seems to be a way that I can feel connected to others who are like minded. When I can read what others think and deal with, it validates some of my own struggles and thoughts. It also gives me a chance to see what people opposite of myself are thinking and that is always a growing experience.
Jay » 12 November, 2003 3:17 AM
> For me, it seems to be a way that I can feel
> connected to others who are like minded.
> When I can read what others think and deal
> with, it validates some of my own struggles
> and thoughts.
Not to argue with you, Jay, because I agree with this... Conversely, though, do you think that Blogging provides this "outlet" because we can't adequately do these things in "real life"? Are we so inundated with 3rd-party (i.e., television, radio, internet, etc.) stimuli that we, as a race, have forgotten how to communicate in person?
> It also gives me a chance to
> see what people opposite of myself are
> thinking and that is always a growing
> experience.
This is so much easier when you don't have to stare them in the eye, huh? :)
> In our obsession to see into the lives of
> others do we somehow run the risk of
> disengaging from our own?
I agree with Jessica... (At least, I'd like to think it is true.)
timsamoff » 12 November, 2003 4:20 AM
I'm sure that somewhat of the driving force behind visiting other blogs is that veyueristic fascination. But for me, it's more of a desire to connect with others in a sort of meeting of the minds, and an admittedly weak form of Koinonia (sp?).
And, Darren, you're f/u question was particularly poignant. Is the viewing of other blogs leading to the exclusion of our own lives? Yes, I think that is a risk. But in more broad terms, I have to question whether the commitment to blogging in itself does this.
My conclusion is, that like many hobbies and non-essential activities, they can get out of hand. I have found that constant self assessment and course correction is required in my spiritual life no matter what the acitivity is. When blogging becomes non edifying and more of a "garbage in garbage out" sort of thing...that's when I'll consider a hiatus.
Great questions though!
Rich » 12 November, 2003 4:32 AM
<...do you think that Blogging provides <this "outlet" because we can't adequately do <these things in "real life"?
Well I guess to answer the first question, I spend so much time with people on this level (by my church position and my teaching position), it is a good way for me to connect without too much of a personal commitment.
<This is so much easier when you don't have to <stare them in the eye, huh? :)
You got it :-)
Jay » 12 November, 2003 2:54 PM
I agree with some of the comments - it's a way to connect with others you might not get to meet in real-life, to get to know folk like you (or even radically different from you!) that you'd never have found a way to ordinarily. It's also perhaps easier to form bonds than it would be normally - "cutting to the chase" as Irene said. Our physical looks and habits don't put each other off...:) Yes, there are some over-exposures at times, but perhaps that gives a peek into the soul and lets one know you're not alone - there are others experiencing similar things that just say more about it that you might.
Michelle » 12 November, 2003 6:34 PM
For an amusing take on the subject, see this article on The Onion (note: some coarse language):
http://www.theonion.com/3944/news3.html
Rachel C » 13 November, 2003 5:20 AM
I believe that what you are concerned about is no different than meeting someone for lunch and during the conversation ask them what's going on in their life, then being attentive as they lay it all out for you.
I don't think it so much that we grow numb to what we are receiving, it's probably more connected to NOT receiving enough details to keep it interesting. e.g. someone might reveal that yesterday they had a life changing experience and stop there. Well...that's great...tell me about it. If they are not willing to fill in the details, of what value is their statement?
A movie about one's plane being hijacked wouldn't have much entertainment value without the small details of the experience.
I think we are interested in the details about the lives of others because we want to compare their lives to our own. If that is the case we certainly don't risk becoming disconnected from our own. We would need to think about it in order to make the comparison.
For some of us it may be that we enjoy living the lives of others vicariously simply because our own lives lack excitement. Isn't that what conversations are all about...the exchange of one another's thoughts, feelings and experiences? I think we enjoy putting ourselves in the place of others and trying to imagine what we would do under the same circumstances.
The little details are what we seek when we see and hear news broadcasts. Does doing that cause us to risk disengaging from our own life?
Clarence » 11 November, 2003 6:23 PM