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A Lego Wedding

20 February, 2004 12:16 PM

bride_groom_minifig.jpgAs I shared a couple of days ago - today I'm marrying a couple of good friends. Its a bit of a hot and windy day here so hopefully it will cool down before 4pm. Thanks for those who suggested illustrations of 'two becoming one'.

I've decided to go with the Lego illustration and have bought my friends a bit bucket of lego as a gift to help illustrate the points. The points being:

- Lego uses the ordinary to make the extraordinary. Whilst individual Lego pieces seem quite ordinary, small and insignificant by themselves they actually have incredible potential to create amazing things which are only limited by ones imagination. The same is true for our friends who are in the process of building an amazing relationship which is exciting for us as friends and family to watch grow.

- Lego's strength is its diversity. Its pieces are all different shapes, colors and sizes. When these diverse pieces come together they actually create some dynamic things. The same is true for our friends who are two unique people. They have different personalities, have had different upbringings, experiences, struggles, achievements etc. Today as they continue the process of 'becoming one' they do not cease to be two - they don't ignore their individuality, but rather their differences are to be celebrated and looked at as strengths. The challenge is to give space for their individuality to blossom and to encourage each other to reach their potential.

- Lego is designed to connect. Today they do take a further step in becoming one - they commit to this connection for life. This doesn't just happen with Lego - for it to come together it takes some intentionality and work. One of the readings of the day is Colossians 3:12-17 which talks about putting on (like clothes) kindness, compassion, forgiveness etc. None of these things accidently happen. Just like they took time/energy/money to choose their clothes for today and to get dressed in their finest it takes time and energy to grow their love.

- It takes a third party to put Lego together - someone who sees the big picture and who knows how the pieces fit together best. Today they are surrounded by a community who can play a part in their growth and relationship. The encouragement is for us all to help foster growth in our friends marriage. Not to dominate it or tell them how to do it, but to encourage and support. More than that we have a God who designed them and sees the bigger picture who desires to be a part of their formation and shaping. His big picture isn't to limit them, but to help them enter into their potential - abundant life.

Should be a fun day.



Oh wow, cool!

Rachel C » 20 February, 2004 8:44 PM

I like it a lot! Way cool. It through me a bit to see "Lego" used in the singlular... I forgot that the "rest" of the world did that... sometimes being American throws me for a loop. But I like the image a lot!

TravisM » 20 February, 2004 10:23 PM

thats the best wedding sermon I've ever heard, or read as the case is, I wish you were not living in Melbourne but Sydney - I'd love to have you come do something like that at our wedding. I'll have to ask our celebrant to do that one.


Stace » 21 February, 2004 1:08 AM

Travis - is plural of Lego Legos?
We have Leggos here - its a brand of pasta!

Darren - I loved the whole little outline above. Very inspirational ad I know that the couple will remeber the effort you made to make their special day just that little bit unique for a long time - probably forever. Well done mate!

Tim » 21 February, 2004 3:18 AM

Yeah we never refer to Legos as "Lego"... its always "Legos", Lego is just the brand name. I love Legos growing up, and recently I just saw an article on Wired.com about a huge Lego fest in Portland, OR. Anywho... Great analogy, and very glad to see it worked out great.

TravisM » 21 February, 2004 11:08 AM

That sounds really AWESOME Darren!

Rachel » 21 February, 2004 1:51 PM

I cannot believe that you are a real minister - that wedding talk is terrible - you cannot be a Christian minister - you make a mockery of Jesus with a talk like that. I'm sick of people watering down the gospel. You suck.

Esther » 23 February, 2004 9:29 AM

what exactly do you think is a mockery in that Esther? I'm wanting to understand you here - I was just trying to use a culturally relevant example to talk about some truths from Scripture. Sort of like Jesus with his parables....sorry I don't have time at the moment to answer too much here, my computer is running out of battery. Would love to dialogue on this some more if you have the time or energy.

Darren Rowse » 23 February, 2004 5:33 PM

I wouldn't say Darren's a normal minister, but he's certainly a real one =).

Justin Baeder » 23 February, 2004 6:22 PM

I totally appreciate the effort you have put into this wedding Darren. Hamo married my husband & I and so many of our families & friends were unmarried, and his sermon, whilst some may argue was unconventional as he used something along a similar line to you, the way it spoke to people was amazing, and if I was going to do it again...i wouldn't ask him to change a thing. I think weddings are often stale and people just do what they think they're supposed to do at weddings (pray some, read the 'Love is patient, love is kind' verse and have some holy words spoken) but I much prefer the real, raw stuff that love, marriage & God is all about.

Bec » 23 February, 2004 7:11 PM

Response to Esther
Hi Esther
I would like to respond to your comments on behalf of Darren - though this response is entirely mine.
First of all let me say you are entitled to your opinion and also to to express it in Darren's comments.
Merriam Webster's online dictionary defines minister as
2 a : one officiating or assisting the officiant in church worship b : a clergyman especially of a Protestant communion
Darren was officiating at a wedding. He is also a Christian - as is stated by him in this web site. Thus whether or not you believe he is a real minister is irrelevant: point of fact he is.
Jesus was not mentioned eiither speciifically or obliquely in the post, so I find it hard to see how you could possibly draw the conclusion that he makes a mockery of Jesus. I will assume that you have associated "Christian" with its meaning, literally Christ's one and are referring to his position as a Christian Minister somehow mocking Jesus through this ceremony outline. It would be good if you could post a response defining how he makes a mockery of Jesus.
You also suggest that Darren has somehow watered down the Gospel with this post. The Gospel is usually associated with the Good News - specifically, Jesus' Death and Resurrection as a method of our salvation.
Once again there is no refence to the gospel either specifically or obliquely. Thus this comment is unfounded and the final comment is not necsaary and a personal attack on darren.
As Darren responded briefly Jesus himself used common and everday articles and sitations as parables and analogies of spirital truth. It is a recognised form of learning and teaching, and my personal opinion is that Darren's use of the Lego in the ceremony was both well thought out and effective.

Netiquette lesson
It is bad manners to write personal attacks on someone elses web site, where you have been invited to make commentary. You are entitled to your opinion, but if you are going to be critical, make a logical case for your criticism citing alternative references etc.
It is also considered especially bad manners to do so anonmously and not leave an email address for response.

Darren asked us to be nice, so please respond to this post, show us genuine reasons to support your statements or take your vitriolic attitude elsewhere.

Tm » 24 February, 2004 7:57 PM

Dear Esther.

I agree with you insofar as I would be truly and greatly saddened if the minister at my wedding used the above analogy. I would be embarrassed for myself, for my new bride, and for the minister - because I know his sermon would go down in local history as the Cheesy Lego Wedding Sermon (tm). I think that to compare something as beautiful and glorious as my holy union to my bride with a ridiculously expensive children's toy is to impinge greatly upon the value of just what it is we are embarking upon. I agree that far better would be to compare the union to that which it is to ba a reflection of: Christ and his bride, the church. I think far better than to speak of Lego's clickabilty, diversity, or potential for building - far better than that would be to gift the wedding couple with words of exhortation, reminding the couple that as they are in Christ, so too will Christ be in and with them, and therefore Christ's love for his own bride, the church can become the fuel for their love for each other. So no, I don't really like the Lego wedding.

But I don't think you were very kind in your comments. I don't think you were very reflective of the love that is in Christ. I don't think you resembled your groom.

Peace out,
The Dane

The Dane » 25 February, 2004 9:12 AM

I think your analogy was great D. Sure - the focus of the analogy was a light hearted (as most analogies are), but the lessons and parallels D has identified *are* serious and it came across as such. It was one of the more interesting wedding's I've been to and the fact it held everyone's attention throughout you should take encouragement from...

Diddle » 25 February, 2004 12:03 PM

Darren (and Esther):
I think that your Lego allegory is very clever, and if the bride and groom at the ceremony were OK with it, then what the rest of us think is really irrelevant. Comparing a marriage to Legos is no worse than comparing personal growth to wheat seeds or to a potter with his clay--it's relevant to the culture of the day and easily understood by the hearers. I think if Jesus were walking the earth today, he might use something similar.

#Debi » 25 February, 2004 3:25 PM

Thanks for the comments - both those who support my wedding talk and those who have expressed some concern.

Perhaps I should clarify a few things.

1. In no way was I attempting to make fun of or brush over the seriousness and beauty of marriage. What you see in the above post is only part of a larger service in which marriage, God and the couple's decision to be joined together in marriage was honored. I used Scripture in every point of the sermon.

2. The couple in question are good friends and were expecting me to marry them in a style that they had seen before. I always try to speak at weddings in a personal way which often uses humor to make a point. Whilst they did not know the specifics of my approach before the day they were aware that I would be doing something creative and fun - to reflect the fun couple that they are. Their response to me after the service was that they enjoyed the service and valued the illustration.

3. At least half (if not more) of those attending the wedding (around 250 in attendance at the service) were not from a churched background. My brief from the couple and my desire was to present something that would be accessible, relatable and relevant to all attending. As I said my post wedding entry I had a lot of feedback from unchurched people saying they appreciated my tack. Of course this doesn't justify it alone.

I guess my approach was a little unorthadox - although I've heard others take even more unorthadox approaches - one friend once preached at a wedding about God being the one who invented the orgasm....I'm not sure I'd go that far!

My hope was to give the couple a service to remember, not for its cheesiness, but because it was personal, meaningful and helped to break down some of the walls between their unchurched friends and their faith.

Anyway, thats my two cents worth, am happy to be critiqued though.

Darren Rowse » 25 February, 2004 3:57 PM

I'm guessing that Esther is an orthodox or Catholic?

Susan » 26 February, 2004 7:20 PM

Heh. As a person who made a LEGO wedding cake for my marriage to my husband last year, I definitely approve! I really like what you've got here about how LEGO connects. Mind if I link to it? That is just the coolest!

Anne » 20 July, 2004 1:18 AM

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